An Authentic, Sometimes Gritty, and Always Hopeful Blog for All Who Live with Severe Physical Pain

Monday, August 22, 2011

What About Healing?

I've been writing about my faith (the past two postings)  Today, I want to write about a hot issue... "What about healing?"

I believe God is all about healing.  However, I'm not convinced   that the healing for which we pray, is necessarily the healing God knows we need.  At least, not for right now; I am convinced that there is no pain, sickness, or sorrow in heaven. 

I have asked God to heal me of this pain disorder many times, along with many others who have prayed for me, and still do.  Our prayers are always around this same “Heal me if it will serve the work of God better.” 

Scripture resonates with the theme that God is more concerned 
with my heart and love for others who need hope, than he is my physical healing.  

The way I see it, God continues to “heal me from the inside out”.  Early on, for example, I needed to be healed from a long-term fear of abandonment that caused me to panic when I found myself with this pain disorder—I believed I had to take care of myself, for no one else would do so.

 Later, I needed to be healed from wounds that caused me to feel worthless unless I was busy “doing” something all the time, and was approved by others for doing "good", "worthy" or "effective" things.  Through my inabilities to be a "doer", and because, honestly, I continued to try to do things I should not have, which resulted in some disapproval by others (sometimes I have to really be kicked in the pants to get the point) I have slowly come to see it's my relationship with God that matters--it's the only things that matters.  I do not need to focus on what I can do, or who I can serve--He will put these things into place according to His plan.

As God healed my need to be seen as a doer of good and important things, He has, ironically, used my weakness in his plan to minister to others. Simply because I keep on keeping on, others are strengthened in faith by it.  It's nothing that I do, except to stay close to Him.  

I see lots of people becoming so overly focused on being healed 
of one specific thing that they will consider nothing less than being healed, 
and will pursue it with all of their might.  

Such single-minded pursuit is an idol of itself.  Pursuing idols leads us only to more pain--hurt relationships, confusion, disappointment, and lack of peace to name a few. Such people miss what God wants to do for them and through them, as they doggedly focus on the wrong healing. 

I acknowledge that healing is and likely always will remain an area of much debate and I would like to refer you to someone far more experienced, knowledgeable and wise than I.  Joni Eareckson Tada covers this topic in a tone of humility and love in her book, When God Weeps.  More than any other book, besides the bible, I have turned to this text for help around the area of God's attitude about suffering and healing.

I pray for your own discernment around asking God for healing! 

Until next time,


  1. Judi,

    Thank you for sharing from your heart. I, too, have prayed to be healed many times. I have learned, as you have written, that God may get greater glory from my pain. I need to trust Him to do what's best. How I look forward to that day when all pain will be gone, and it will be pure joy living with my Savior!

    I appreciate so much your encouraging blog!

  2. Ginigirl- thanks for posting! Trust is the key for sure! Could you write more about how you have seen God at work through your pain?